Editor’s Note: This article details instances of sexual assault, which may be distressing or triggering for some readers.
The hitNetflixshowSex Educationhas never been one to shy away from difficult topics or the sexual experiences of adolescents, from queer sex to vaginismus, no topic is left uncovered. However, it is Aimee’s storyline of sexual assault that is a standout for the show.
Aimee Gibbs (Aimee Lou Wood) is the fun-loving, kind-hearted, ditzy best friend of Maeve (Emma Mackey). In the third episode of Season 2, she is sexually assaulted on her way to school. Aimee gets on her usual bus and smiles politely at the man behind her, whilst holding Maeve’s homemade birthday cake. Her face falls to utter disbelief when the man behind her starts masturbating on her, and her cries for him to stop and for other passengers to help her are only met with stares.
Later at school, Aimee relays the incident to Maeve, with her main concern being if she’ll be able to remove the semen stain from her jeans. Aimee is shocked when Maeve tells her she has been assaulted and needs to report the incident to the police. She even claims he was “probably just lonely” and “It’s silly, I’m fine, honestly”. Aimee’s assault is so relatable to female viewers as we all suffer through micro sexual aggression from men, and are engrained to believe that it is normal, to just grin and bear it.
It isn’t until after visiting the police station, where they admit there is very little that can be done, that Aimee realizes what has happened. What’s so realistic about the depiction is that it took Aimee hours, until she was home alone in her room to accept and feel the situation, to understand that she was assaulted.
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For the rest of the season, we see Aimee struggling with the aftermath of her assault. She physically separates herself from her boyfriend, becoming triggered by any physical intimacy. She even hallucinates her assailant at parties and school, and continues to walk to school to avoid the bus. Yet, Aimee insists that she is all right, downplaying and minimizing the situation.
The show tackles this perfectly, as rape culture has engrained survivors with the belief that unless you are raped, you shouldn’t talk about it; instead you must accept it, move on and even laugh about it. You’re not allowed to be upset; instead, you must internalize the fear of overreacting or being a drama queen. As a result, many women have turned their assaults into funny anecdotes instead of processing the trauma.Sex Educationgoes against the dominant narrative of sweeping assault under the rug, that it’s not a big deal and to just “get over it.”
Unlike similar shows, the series regularly checks in on Aimee throughout the season, showing what has happened to her character because of her suppression of trauma. In a heartwarming yet similarly heartbreaking scene, the other female characters give weight to Aimee’s assault, in a sense allowing her to experience and accept her trauma. In dealing with assault, Aimee emphasizes the importance of a support system, where often it isn’t until someone gives you “permission” and validates your trauma that you can fully accept it. The women share their similar experiences of assault and harassment, and in the final scene, all join Aimee riding the bus.
Aimee sums up a common realization survivors and teenage girls have, saying that she isn’t necessarily scared to see her assaulter on the bus again, but that because he had such a kind face, it feels like “if he could do something like that, then anyone could." TV shows often depict perpetrators as strangers with scary features and dispositions, however, in reality, women also face handsome, charming and polite men who harass and assault them. The conversation is an accurate portrayal of girls growing up and realizing their vulnerability.
What makesSex Education’s depiction of assault stand above the rest is also that Aimee’s storyline doesn’t end in Season 2. Her friends supporting her to ride the bus again could have tied the story in a nice (although unrealistic) bow, leaving her character to return to comedic relief. However, realistically Aimee’s trauma bleeds into her character in Season 3, as in real life you cannot simply recover from sexual assault overnight, by starting a new season or rolling the credits. The continuation of the storyline is so important to challenge the perceptions of viewers, that the healing process is slow, unique, and not linear.
Season 3 opens with a sex montage; however, Aimee is notably not taking part in sexual activities with her boyfriend, instead preferring to go trampolining. She continues to struggle with physical intimacy and agrees to go see Jean (Gillian Anderson), a sex therapist, after admitting to Maeve she feels safer on her own.
Again,Sex Educationis revolutionary as it doesn’t shy away from depicting how sexual assault can change you as a person. In one of the most powerful scenes in the series, Aimee explains to Jean that she just wants to feel like the “old” and “smiley” Aimee again, blaming her happy disposition and smiling at the perpetrator as the reason she was assaulted. Jean tells Aimee that she may never be the same again, but that that is okay and from processing her trauma she can gain clarity on the event. Importantly, Jean adds that “what that man did to you on the bus has nothing to do with your smile, or your personality, and is only about him. And it is absolutely not your fault.”
Every survivor of assault and harassment should watch this scene and absorb Jean’s words. It is so vital for survivors to hear they are not to blame for their assault in such direct terms, as so many internalize their feelings of guilt and shame, believing their actions resulted in their assault.
Aimee’s storyline is a real depiction of surviving assault, of minimizing and suppressing trauma, withdrawing from physical intimacy, blaming yourself and seeking help to process trauma. It helps women understand and accept their feelings from personal traumatic experiences and assaults, to see that they are not alone, that they are not to blame, and to understand there are support systems and services.
In the public discourse, trauma from sexual assault is only valid when it is rape; however, Aimee emphasizes the falsehood of this. All assaults are traumatic, and all survivors deserve to be supported, believed, and respected.
