Directing a movie is no easy task, so when a new director bursts onto the scene, it can be quite an event. Some of the best movies in history areoutstanding and memorable directing debuts, and some of the most acclaimed filmmakers of all time began their careers with a highly celebrated first feature. However, outstanding directorial debuts are in the minority; in fact, most are simply average, and a noteworthy few are well below that.
Some incredible filmmakers, likeJames Cameron, kicked off their filmographies with an opener that they can only wish they could disown.Other directing debuts, like Ed Wood’sGlen or Glenda, were subpar efforts from directors who didn’t get better with age. Unfortunately,these directorial debuts rank among the worst in motion picture history, resulting in underwhelming and sometimes outright terrible movies that have aged quite poorly.
10’Alien³' (1992)
Directed by David Fincher
Nowadays,David Fincheris praised as one of the greatest directors working in the industry. He’s the modern master of thrillers, though he has dipped his toes into all sorts of other genres throughout his career. One of those genres is sci-fi, as much as Fincher may wish that it hadn’t been. The filmmaker’s first movie wasAlien³, one ofthe worst sequels of all time, where Ripley crash-lands on a prison planet after her latest ordeal. Upon her arrival, she notices that she may have brought an undesired visitor along.
Fincher himself has stated thatno one hatesAlien³more than he does, but a few fans could certainly give him a run for his money. Though by no means atrocious, thanks to impressive visual effects and decent action scenes,Alien³lacks all the suspense and strong atmosphere that made its two predecessors so iconic. This was likely due to the nightmarish production, which was characterized most of all by relentless studio interference. Fincher would thankfully soon prove to be an exceptional director, but his debut was so poor that it nearly tanked his career before it had even taken off.
9’Stereo (Tile 3B of a CAEE Educational Mosaic)' (1969)
Directed by David Cronenberg
A trailblazer in experimental cinema, the master of body horror, and director of some ofthe best Canadian movies ever made, Torontonian auteurDavid Cronenbergis nowadays one of the most respected figures in his field. However, one wouldn’t have been able to tell what kind of mad genius hid behind the camera of his first film,Stereo (Tile 3B of a CAEE Educational Mosaic). This highly experimental sci-fi horror film is disguised as an educational film documenting an attempt to turn eight subjects into telepaths.
Though its creativity and originality are unbridled, and the clues of Cronenberg’s skill are definitely there,Stereofeels annoyingly pretentious and formally tedious. All in all, it feels like nothing more than a few great ideas crammed into a nonsensical package. At only a little over an hour in length, the torment thankfully doesn’t last very long, but for anyone who isn’t a die-hard Cronenberg completionist,Stereoshould be best left avoided.
Watch on Criterion
8’X-Men: Dark Phoenix' (2019)
Directed by Simon Kinberg
With 2000’sX-Men, 20th Century Studios kicked off the superhero movie craze that has defined much of the 21st century’s blockbuster landscape. Through ups and downs, the series went out not with a bang but with a faint fizzle in the form ofX-Men: Dark Phoenix. It was directed bySimon Kinberg, who produced and wrote a few of the franchise’s past installments but had never directed a movie before.
Not that there’s anything inherently wrong with handing the reins of an iconic franchise over to someone with no directing experience, but that was a challenge that Kinberg was not up to.Dark Phoenixsquanders its standout cast and legendary story due to a terrible script, confusing visuals, and lifeless directionby Kinberg. For all these reasons and more,Dark Phoenixusually ranks as one ofthe worst superhero films of all time.
X-Men: Dark Phoenix
7’Dementia 13' (1963)
Directed by Francis Ford Coppola
One would be hard-pressed to find someone willing to argue against the fact thatFrancis Ford Coppola, the man behindThe Godfathertrilogy andApocalypse Now, is one of the best filmmakers ever. However, it wasn’t always that way. The director’s first movie wasDementia 13, aPsycho-like horror thriller about a widow hatching a plan to get her late husband’s inheritance, unaware that she’s being targeted by a murderer lurking in the family’s estate.
Saying thatDementia 13’s production was rushed would be an understatement. The late producerRoger Cormanjust wanted a cheapPsychoknockoff, so he placed it in Coppola’s (who used to be a sound technician) hands, giving him nine days to shoot the movie.The result is a picture that isn’t particularly scary or thrillingbut rather boring and with little to no personality of its own. There areplenty of great and disturbing horror thrillers, but this isn’t one of them.
Watch on Tubi
6’Glen or Glenda' (1953)
Directed by Edward D. Wood Jr.
Edward D. Wood Jr., better known as Ed Wood, is regarded by many as the single worst movie director of all time. As true as that may be, Wood was a fascinating figure with a fascinating creative voice, which made him worthy of being the subject of a biopic directed byTim Burton. Of the many atrociously incompetent films that he made,Glen or Glendais perhaps one of the most intriguing. In it, a psychiatrist tells the stories of a transvestite and a pseudohermaphrodite.
Mind-bendingly bizarre and overtly Freudian,Glen or Glendais an exquisitely strange look into Ed Wood’s exquisitely strange mind. It’s not a good film in any way whatsoever, seeing as it has a senseless narrative, dumb acting, and a complete lack of understanding of how cinematic storytelling works. However,Glen or Glendaalso has plenty of the Wood-isms that havemade his movies surprising cult classicsdespite their abysmal quality.
Watch on Amazon
5’Nomads' (1986)
Directed by John McTiernan
The action movie genre wouldn’t be what it is today withoutJohn McTiernan, the man behind genre classics likePredatorandDie Hard. It’s a good thing, then, that studios and audiences gave him a chance to direct some ofthe best action movies of all time, considering thatNomadsis such a terrible debut that giving its director a second shot must have been a hard decision. It’s about a French anthropologist specializing in nomadic groups who moves to L.A. to follow a group of sinister street punks who may be more than they seem.
Nomadsis such a terrible debut that giving its director a second shot must have been a hard decision.
For those who love terrible accents,Pierce Brosnan’s half-attempt at a French one should be an absolute delight. For all other viewers, though,Nomadsis unlikely to have anything of interest. It’s corny, confusing, and so busy trying to have an interesting visual style (which it fails at) that it forgets to have a coherent story. Although the director is easy to call one of the best in his genre,this debut wasn’t a good indicator of McTiernan’s talent.
4’Fear and Desire' (1952)
Directed by Stanley Kubrick
Anyone who thinks thatStanley Kubricknever directed a single bad film in his career has clearly not seen his debut.Fear and Desireis a rather boring war drama about four soldiers trapped behind enemy lines who must confront their fears and desires to survive. One would think that Kubrick would have been able to get plenty of narrative juice out of such a premise. Sadly,even Kubrick thought that the result was underwhelming, saying thatthe movie was “amateurish"and “like a child’s drawing on a fridge.”
It’s a nicely shot movie, but that’s about where the strengths end. It reads more like a pretentious student film than a work of art due to lackluster performances and virtually lifeless direction. Indeed,Fear and Desirecan only be described as inept. It should, at least, encourage aspiring filmmakers that even an institution like Kubrick, who some regard as the greatest of all time, stumbled when he was just getting started.
3’Piranha II: The Spawning' (1982)
Directed by James Cameron
Some would find it unfair to callPiranha II: The SpawningJames Cameron’s debut, considering that most of the work was actuallydone by producerOvidio G. Assonitis, who constantly undermined Cameron’s decisions and fired him five days into shooting. However, the director’s name will forever be in the movie’s credits, making thisJawsripoff about flying piranhas terrorizing a Caribbean island resort, James Cameron’s first official film.
Piranha II: The Spawninghas an unintimidating tone, bad performances, and a ludicrously silly story.
Those who love terrible horror B-movies should have a field day withPiranha II. However, those who find the concept unpleasant would be unlikely to enjoy the film. With an unintimidating tone, bad performances, and a ludicrously silly story, this makes itself worthy of its reputation asan iconic so-bad-it’s-good extravaganza. It may have extremely little of James Cameron’s directorial voice, but at least his next movie was none other thanThe Terminator.
Rent on Amazon
2’The Room' (2003)
Directed by Tommy Wiseau
Hilariously melodramatic, exquisitely goofy, andendlessly quotable for all the wrong reasons,Tommy Wiseau’sThe Roomstill reigns supreme among so-bad-they’re-good masterpieces. It’s a laughably poor attempt at a tragedy, where a successful banker’s seemingly perfect life starts crumbling when his fiancée embarks on an affair with his best friend.
Judging him solely onThe Room, one might deservedly assume that Tommy Wiseau is an alien. After all, from the way the movie is written and directed, it seems that he has no understanding of how humans talk or behave. Likewise, he seems to have no understanding of how stories are structured or how movies are made. Alas,this incompetence is what makesThe Roomso irresistibly fun and infinitely rewatchable. Sure, it’s one of the worst directing debuts of all time, but the world is all the better for it.
Buy on Amazon
1’Manos: The Hands of Fate' (1966)
Directed by Harold P. Warren
Image via Emerson Film Enterprises
Panned by many asthe single worst movie ever made, the infamousManos: The Hands of Fateis about a family who, after getting lost on the highway, stumble upon a mysterious Satanic cult. Many movies make their shoestring budget one of their strengths, butHarold P. Warrencouldn’t do that inManos. Instead, the result of such financial limitations and artistic ineptitude is one of the most puzzlingly atrocious films to ever come into being.
Manos: The Hands of Fatemust be seen to be believed; it’s so incredibly bad that it far transcends the boundaries of cinema itself.It’s too slow and boring to be called so-bad-it’s-good, but too fascinatingly horrible not to recommendto all those who consider themselves movie fans.Manosbreaks the rules of filmmaking and reality itself enough to make any viewer wonder why the universe ever allowed such a thing to populate its realm. When it comes to directorial debuts, it hardly gets worse than this.
